Merging

I've had this blog for years. But on June 28,2009 I started "The Process of Letting Go" documenting my journey through recovery of my eating disorder. The URL is www.processoflettinggo.blogspot.com

I've decided to merge these two. Clearly I write more in this one and for almost two years I've kept them at a distance. I realize that you can't compartmentalize your life. It seems fake me having one blog about my life with friends, Travis, outings etc. Then another blog strictly about my eating disorder. Because they are one in the same. 

I cannot pretend it's not there and it's a dangerous place to ignore it and fall back into habits. 

So this blog will now incorporate my struggle with my eating disorder. Along with my truly wonderful life. Nothing is perfect :)

This week has been rough, physically. I'll explain...

Monday I got up and Travis and I went to the gym. It was great to get back but at home I started feeling extremely dizzy, sweaty with cramps that felt like shooting pain in my lower back. I had to take breaks to curl in a ball when I was doing my makeup & hair. After curling for about an hour they started to subside. This was also after I took 600 mg of Ibuprofen. 

I didn't think much of it and went on with my day. Including a long day spent at Temple Bar and Wood's Coffee. 

Tuesday morning the pain in my lower back actually woke me up. I decided to take 800 mg of Ibuprofen and was able to start the day. I ended up calling my doctor and describing my symptoms. They said they were just menstrual cramps and to continue on the ibuprofen. 

I ended up going to Sarah's for 'Taco Tuesday' then to Copper Hog. 

Wednesday I woke up in more continued pain. I decided to schedule an appt. on Thursday morning. Wednesday at work I was sore all day and when I got home around 8pm I just went into this whole body aching. It was nothing like I've ever felt and I just was in a little ball in the nest that I had pulled out for me and Travis. 

Thursday morning I went to the doctor and found out I have a UTI. Which makes sense. They gave me antibiotics to take for 3 days and continue on the ibuprofen. But when I got home from work Thursday it got worse. I laid on the couch with an ice pack on my face in pain. Travis was so wonderful. He got me pure cranberry juice, sleepy time tea, a pumpkin candle, chicken noodle soup, and chocolate. He took such good care of me. 

It smells like fall

Oliver's been my sick buddy

Friday morning I woke up with so much pain that I couldn't stand up straight. I e-mailed work and then Travis took me to the doctor. They extended my antibiotics and told me to stay in bed the day. I was taking 2400 mg ibuprofen. My doctor also switched me from Zoloft to Celexa. I've felt like I've plateaued on Zoloft the last few months and have been experiencing more consistent anxiety. Celexa is aimed more towards anxiety and we are going to give it a shot. I'm hope it works better. 

Friday was a long annoying day of aches. I slept a big part of the afternoon. 

It's really hard for me to stay in one place being sick. It adds to my anxiety and doesn't help my thought process. 

Saturday I woke up feeling so much better. I took all my drugs early and the day went so much better. Just slight lower back pain. It was good to be up and about too. 

So that was THIS shitty week. 

Now I'm just at home with Oliver, taking it easy. I think another lavender bubble bath is needed.